Archive for the 'inspirational' Category

28
May
09

Reminder :-)

My first talk show is tonight at 6:00pm Eastern/3:00pm Pacific. I didn’t choose a topic to talk about because this show is basically just about getting my feet wet, learning the controls and things like that. So whatever you all want to discuss we will talk about. 🙂 Once I get into the groove I will have specific topics for the shows, and hopefully some awesome surprises!

Just go to my show page Mad As A Hatter to tune in. I will have the chatroom opened about 15 minutes before the show starts. Once you are at my page the blue player at the top SHOULD start automatically (once my show is on air) so you can listen and if you scroll down the page just a teeny bit, the chat should be there. I am crossing my fingers that it all works like it should hahaha.

Make an account there (it’s free) and fave my show AND friend me! Hope to see you all there and TALKING to me. You can also chat in the chat room with anyone else there AND with me. 🙂

See ya there.

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25
May
09

good days…

SmilesMy good days are few and far between, but this weekend has been GOOD. I’ve smiled and laughed more than I have in a long time. My tummy is full and my mental state feels somewhat ok…somewhat ok for me, is actually really good.

My oldest daughter Mel came to see me and K today. We were watching old Saturday Night Live footage of Adam Sandler, John Belushi, etc. I had one girl on each side of me here on the bed, both being affectionate and we were all laughing. It felt GOOD. It’s nice to have a good time, rather than being depressed and crying, which I do everyday…

I feel sometimes that not enough GOOD things happen to me. I struggle every day with money worries, memories of my abuse, “Dad’s” sick phone calls. But then sometimes, if I wish hard enough and God is willing, an angel will fall from the sky 😉 and I smile and it’s good.

Today…..is good. God let it stay good, let me fall asleep peacefully with a small grin on my face.

21
May
09

For D…

This post is for my lovely wife D…this is another one of our early songs…It came on my playlist a few minutes ago and I felt the need to put it on here for her to always have to see, even when I am gone. I love you honey…

29
Apr
09

happy birthday mama!!

happybirthdaymama

Happy Birthday 70th Mama! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!! You have been my advocate, my friend, much more than I can even write here! I hope I have you in my life for MANY more years. You can’t go until I do…I don’t know what I would do without you. You’ve taken care of me, I remember when I first got sick, you bathed me, cleaned up my puke, you loved on me…rubbed lotion on me to make me feel good…hell you even wiped my butt *SIGH*. I love you for it…and I will never forget it…

Now I am off to make your birthday cake. I know you don’t care about cards, flowers, presents, but I remember you always saying “I want my damn birthday cake!” So, birthday cake you get! Off I go!

I love you Mama! Always…Happy Birthday *MUAHHHH* kisses for you!

29
Mar
09

it’s the little things that make me smile..

i_love_my_baby_girlLike when my little girl and I were sitting here on my bed playing Mystery Case Files:Ravenheart 2 together, I was having trouble seeing some of the hidden objects and I said something about my eyesight…and I am in HORRIBLE pain today, my upper back and neck are hurting so bad I have cried off and on all day. It was hurting so bad it was hard to play the game, she saw me wincing and reached her little hand back and started to rub my shoulders and neck…then I said “I am just falling apart all over aren’t I baby?”. She said, “You are still the greatest person in the world Daddy!!”. *SIGH* It made me teary eyed to hear her say that…she loves me no matter what. That’s true unconditional love..

Yeah..it’s those little things that keep me alive.

I’m out..

27
Jan
09

be inspired!

We all go through life bitching about one thing or the other, from having no money, to life dealing us a shitty hand. You want to complain and bitch about the mundane…then you see something like this:

And you see that our lives aren’t so bad, there is always someone in more pain, having more problems than we are.

I LOVE this guys inspirational message he sends out to people everywhere. His philosophy is a lot like mine. STRENGTH, you have to have strength to deal with life. I know I would be dead already without being so stubborn and strong. I would have given up the first time I contemplated suicide for the first time at 8 years old. You see, I have fallen so many times and had to pull myself  back up, but I did, and no matter WHAT, I kept going, kept trudging on. We all have the strength to get back up, but sometimes in all the crap we go through in life we forget that. Then we see something like this…and it makes us cry (well it did me) and makes us see that life isn’t SO terrible and we CAN get back up — no matter WHAT knocks us to the ground.

Thanks Nick Vujicic  for being a HERO!  You can also check out his other site Attitude Is Altitude.

That’s it for today. More later.




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