Posts Tagged ‘government issues


now this is the shit that really pisses me off!!

Most of you have probably heard about the story of the “parents” that named their child Adolph Hitler…I was reading Shaun’s blog and read something that fucking INFURIATED me, so I am going to rant about it.

Here is the link to Shaun’s post —> Parents Of Adolph Hitler To Be Evicted (you should really read Shawn’s blog regularly, I love it)! Anyhow…to my rant.

If you read the full post you will see this — “The Campbells’ neighbors described a family living on the fringe, financially and socially. Mr. Campbell, 35, and his wife, Deborah, 25, do not work and receive disability payments for emphysema and neck pain, respectively.”

Now, he is 35 and she is 25 and receiving disability and *I* can’t fucking get it?? WHAT THE FUCK? Neck pain and emphysema? I have those…leukemia, I have it, end stage renal disease, I have it, neck and back pain, yeah I have it so severe that some days I can’t even walk, yet the fucking government has fought me for mine for nearly 8 fucking years. HOW pathetic is that?

“Their landlord, Larry Lippincott, who shares the two-family home, said the family is often up all night.”

“I hear the kids playing at 2:30 in the morning and the TV on,” Mr. Lippincott said. “He told me he was a night person and didn’t like to do anything during the day.”

Ahhh, so in other words, they are lazy fucks who stay up all night, sleep all day and bilk the system for disability, while honest people like me, who are REALLY sick and REALLY in pain can’t get it. We have to fight and fight, and still get turned down over and over again.

It’s people like THIS that make it so hard for people like me, with real problems, to get our disability. I bet neither of them have hardly worked a day in their life (if at ALL), probably  haven’t paid much (if any) taxes, yet they can sure get paid to sit on their asses and stay up all night, doing God knows what.

The government is giving money to two people who named ALL three of their children Nazi names and who have Nazi swastikas all around their house. Way to go U.S. government.

They say the “poor” dude is hospitalized due to stress…Whatever — *rolls eyes*. I swear it’s shit like this that makes me lose even MORE faith in our system. I have re-filed my disability again, let’s see how many more times I get turned down, while people like this couple keep getting and getting. *Growls*

I’m out!


Doctor’s appointment and general bitching…

So I had my doctor appointment yesterday. First off he checked my belly button area and said he didn’t feel a hernia, so the hernia repair is still ok, BUT, he thinks I may have adhesion’s (scar tissue) in that area and it might have some of my intestine blocked *SIGH*. I have to see the surgeon on Tuesday the 30th and I will know more about that. Now on to my back pain. This pain in my upper back/neck area is some of THE worst pain I have ever felt in my life. I am losing control of my left arm, both arms are weak, it’s hard to type, I have to rest a lot when I type blogs, etc., I can’t really write at all, it is affecting my memory, the way I walk, my speech *SIGH*. The pain is a constant deep, burning ache that never goes away. It runs down my left arm to my fingers (I am a lefty so this is NOT good). It is now hurting a bit on the right side as well. Every now and again it feels like bee stings or electric shocks are running through the area and it makes my whole body jerk with the pain. My doctor said that it is definitely spinal compression, we just have to find out what is causing the compression. Since I was diagnosed with DDD (Degenerative Disc Disease)/Arthritis of my spine when I was 8 years old, is it THAT? You know, herniated discs, it is bone spurs or GOD forbid is it cancer that has spread to my spine and a tumor is pushing on my spinal column? I will know more after my MRI which is also Tuesday the 30th. My doctor said regardless of WHAT it is I still have to have surgery. So it’s not a matter of IF, it’s a matter of WHEN it will happen. We have to figure out first what is causing the compression, then we have to find a neurologist who will see me and do the surgery for me, because I still have NO fucking insurance (thanks to the government still fighting my disability, the assholes).

He put me on Neurontin…has anyone who reads me ever taken it? I don’t know what to expect from it. It’s SUPPOSE to help with nerve pain. I won’t get it for at least 3 weeks though, because it is expensive and I have to wait for the drug company who makes it to approve me and give me my 3 months free supply *SIGH*.  My doctor IS so good though, he knows I am in real pain, and he is the one who said he and other primary care physicians can’t write narcotics on a regular basis. Well, he gave me my tramadol with NO questions asked (THANK GOD), and he wrote me Vicodin (not the BEST narcotic for pain, but better than nothing) to do me until I get the Neurontin. He really does do everything he can to help me. He actually calls me at home to ask me how I am and things like that. I have NEVER had a doctor do those things for me. He’s wonderful, just wonderful. I am blessed to have found him.

Now for the bitching. My ex doctor should have LISTENED to me on so many levels, but he didn’t. I TOLD him about the pain in my upper back/neck area about 8 months ago, he just put me on more pain meds, didn’t x-ray it, didn’t touch me to check the area, NOTHING. I told him a year or more ago about my heart beating weirdly, he dismissed that and didn’t do any testing. Now I find out that my heart IS damaged, it is not properly pumping blood to my body. My neck/upper back area IS fucked up. He DID NOT listen to me, he dismissed everything I said, just giving me more and more narcotics and stupid me thought–“Well, he IS a doctor, I guess he knows best.”–how stupid I was *SIGH*. I have spoken to other patients of his, he NEVER diagnoses ANYTHING, he simply gives out more and more pain pills. He is a pill mill, a fucking pill mill. I told D last night that I AM suing him. I am going to start looking for lawyers after Christmas. He is NOT going to get away with what he’s done to me. If he had listened to me, to my complaints of pain, would my heart have not been so damaged? Would my spine problems have been lessened? Because of him, I now have irreversible heart damage, I am facing paralysis because of the compression of my spine, and I have to wonder if he is not partially at fault for my kidney failure. Did all the damn medications he had me on hurt my only kidney and cause it to slowly fail? *SIGH* I am SO very pissed off right now. I want to sue his ass– I am also going to report him to the AMA and the KY board of physicians. I wouldn’t be surprised if they found out he was defrauding Medicaid and such.

So anyhow, I do have SOME pain relief thanks to my new wonderful doctor. Thanks to the ex doctor I have to have spine surgery or be paralyzed, what a choice to make huh? Hmm, do I want them to cut my throat and go in to work on my spine or do I want to just wait until it compresses so bad I am paralyzed–*shakes my head*–I am on dialysis and will be the rest of my life and my heart is damaged.


FUCK YOU Dr. Butthead! GAH! I am so upset, so very upset. All evening yesterday and since I have been up this morning, I have went between crying my eyes out to raging like a bull. I am PISSED. I am scared and I am in FUCKING pain–thanks Dr. Asshole, thanks a lot.


Blood out…Blood in… HEH

*edit*–I was reading the blogs on my blogroll as I do every day. Yesterday I found a guy who was abused and I read some of his blog entries and put him on my blogroll. I went to read him today and saw his latest post–it included such kind words about me and a link here to my blog. It brought me to tears and I want to link to that post. Thank you Donnie! The post is here! Now back to your regularly scheduled reading! hah


I am sitting here doing my stupid dialysis. I was an hour late getting started–We usually get it going by 8:00 am on Mon., Wed, and Fri., but I was so tired this morning, still drained from this chest thing I have, that I begged Kev to let me sleep until 9:00. I woke up coughing up blood tinged—stuff. YUCK. I am pretty sure now I have pneumonia again. I am trying to wait it out until Friday when I have my doctor’s appointment. If the blood gets any heavier, I will have to go before then *le sigh*. Ahh, Kevin just brought my coffee to me…it is a routine on dialysis day. I tend to get headaches from it, we think it might be that cleaning my blood might put me into caffeine withdrawal, so the coffee does help a little. I still get mild headaches, leg cramps and shit. I hope that it finally gets easier to take, I don’t know. Blah.

I am still worried about what the doctor is going to tell me on Friday about my Tramadol. I really don’t think I could take the withdrawals from it–and I know my life will be hell with NO pain meds at all in my system *SIGH*. Just pray that either he can keep writing them, since they aren’t a really strong narcotic OR that my “fairy godmother(father)” comes through and I can go to pain management (which would be the ultimate help for me). I have had numerous people say “Kevin has money, why can’t HE pay for your pain management?”, well–go read his blog HERE and you will see why he can’t. I have checked all over my area, there are NO programs to help me. I am not eligible for Medcaid until the stupid government declares me “disabled”. WHAT THE FUCK more do they have to see? I have terminal leukemia, I am on dialysis, I have COPD, I have DDD (severe degenerative disk disease), my heart isn’t pumping blood like it should, yet they want to keep fighting me. My mother says they are just waiting for me to die so they won’t have to pay me all that back pay they owe me. WHATEVER, I would gladly say “Screw the back pay, just give me my monthly check and my MEDICAID”. That medicaid is worth it’s weight in gold to me. 😦 Not only would it pay for most of my medications, it would pay for my doctor visits, pain management, any hospitalizations or tests I might need. It will also pay for people to come to my home and help me with things, like cleaning house, monitoring my blood  pressure, diabetes, etc., etc. All help I really could use!

I am lucky that my doctors only charge me 15.00 an office visit, but unfortunately the pain management doctor won’t do that, so I am just screwed unless someone comes through to help me. They “can’t” help me with pain meds unless I see the pain management doctor, BUT if/when I decide to go off of dialysis they have told me that they will get hospice in and they will give me all the pain meds I need to “keep me comfortable” until I die (which would be 10-14 days after stopping dialysis). So they will give me pain meds if I give up and say “Fuck it”, but they won’t give me pain meds to help me live *SIGH*. Ah well. We will see what happens, huh?

I am off today, no DJing, Wednesdays are my usual day off. I had someone just send me an IM wanting me to DJ on New Year’s Eve to help with an online party they are having, New Year’s Eve falls on my day off, so I will have to see if I can get one of the DJ’s to switch shifts with me. Let’s see if they will. Hell I can’t go out and party on New Year’s Eve, why not ring it in with Kev, my wife D and my listeners? 😀

Ok I am tired of typing right now. More later. - The internets fastest growing blog directory

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