Posts Tagged ‘weak

06
Jul
09

it begins…..again.

cancerSUCKSWell they started my continous chemo drip this morning…I’m already feeling kind of shitty, I hate these awful meds running through my system. I DO NOT want to lose my hair GOD šŸ˜¦ . I guess I will find out in about 2 weeks, huh?

I will do 4 days of theĀ continous drip, then 3 days off and taking Prednisone. I hate steroids too, they make me VERY emotional, make me want to eat everything in sight. My oldest said they turn me into a bitch HAHAHA. This cycle will go on for 6 weeks. I HOPE it gets everything under control. GOD I have fought this shit for almost 10 years now.

Sometimes I get sick of fighting, but then I look at my wife, my kids, my family and I HAVE to keep trying…if I was alone, no family, I would just let nature take it’s course and finally be free of not only this disease, but my “Dad”. WOW, how nice that would feel, to be disease and pain free…to be rid of the monster in my life (aka–“Dad”). To be healed and have no scars on my body….ah one day. One day we will ALL be perfect again, happy and FREE. That will be wonderful, huh?

I had to go to the grocery store today for my monthly shop. I didn’t even make it halfway through the store and I was so weak I could barely walk. I am stubborn and REALLY don’t want to have to use my wheelchair or one of those motorized carts at the store, but it seems I am going to have to swallow my pride and use ’em, because right now I am in a LOTĀ  of pain and so weak. YUCK, YUCK!!!!!

Ok enough complaining. I am alive, I have my family and I have love, so I AM happy…

I’m out…

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30
May
09

Just a quickie..

I started a new blog for my talk show. The link to it is -> Mad As A Hatter. So if there’s anything you want to know such as when the next show is, what’s coming up, any special guests, etc., please blog roll or bookmark the blog! šŸ™‚ If you would like me to add you to the blog roll at the show blog, just post a comment over there and I would be glad to add it!

I am weak and tired this weekend, resting a lot and watching TV with K. I am in a lot of pain and it’s hard to sit up for a long time and it’s also hard to get around. So this weekend is definitely a BLOB weekend. I hope you all are doing well!

If anyone needs to talk to me, leave me an offline or call me. šŸ™‚

I’m out…

11
May
09

it begins…again.

fuckcancerThis morning I started radiation yet AGAIN, my 5th timeĀ in 8 years. It is on my brain, because one of the tumorsĀ is growing again and giving me massive headaches and making my seizures worse. I did the radiation, came home and immediately got hooked up to my dialysis machine. I am exhausted, fatigued and I can’t seem to stay awake, I keep falling asleep sitting up.

1 day down, 34 more rounds to go. *SIGH* Good night.




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